As I walked along the stadium boundary, I increased my speed many folds.No, not because I was followed but because it was a natural impulse. All of fifteen yet eight years in the constant shadow of eve teasing, groping, molestation makes you instinctive and alert like a deer in the forest.
All of a sudden I hear a voice, "tssk tssk" I speed up frantically and in moments, a boy hardly of 16 or 17 comes in grabs my hand and says "Come with me."
"No!" I shout back and try to bite him. He slaps me but I somehow manage to free myself but he grabs me from the back
I remembered what my father said to me but he is facing my back so, how can I. I struggle vehemently making sure I don't shout because I knew shouting may turn this into a group thing and a lone person is easier to fight than the group.
As I struggled my life flashed past me. "The Topper Me", "The House Vice Captain Me","The Good Daughter Me", "The Responsible Elder Sister Me.", "The Writer Me.", "The Ambitious Me.", "The Hopelessly Romantic Me." all flashed past me and I thought all will end. Was my life all these to come to an end like this? Am I nothing but a stranger's object of perverted lust? Will my first touch by the opposite sex be that of a horror?. Funnily I didn't know how intercourse is but I knew Rape was something which can even kill you.
As I was counting my breathes thinking it to be my last few I thought that let him turn me and then I will kick him but then he left me and I saw that the reason for his sudden kindness was a car that passed by, I ran hard and reached to a place where there were people and soon faced another eve teasing.
I confided in my best friend who was a girl as I could not disclose it to my parents as they had hands full with their own problem. What she did was amazing. She spread it across like a wild fire. i was taunted and teased in hushed voices just because I was a quiet child my emotions were not counted in.
A few days later while traveling by a Tempo (Ford Tempo in Public Transport Form) I was groped as usual by someone aged 20 to 22. I kept quiet and tried to angle myself to safety. All of a sudden a boy from the tution of my age riding a bike (in small towns legal age of driving a bike is not an issue) offered me a lift and i gladly took it. On sitting on his bike the first thought struck me was, "Oh My God! What have i done?" this boy had a crush on me and used to gaze me all day long in the classes. I became petrified remembering the incident a few days back. The way I was treated and the insults afterwards had shattered my confidence. it had robbed me of my childhood and adolescence. All the while he was talking sweet nothings and was having a time of his life (We didn't had social networking so, the adolescent love had its innocence) and i was having a harrowing time with in me that he would.....
But he didn't. He left me to my destination and the next time we talked properly was ten years after.
My anger subsided after this.
I noted a few things:
1. The person who assaulted me was from the unprivileged section of the society: He lacked education, had to see the harsher part of the life and was aggressive and brutal. He was so, used to be treated like an animal that he became an animal. If he is a criminal in the making whose fault is it? His or the society? The Government? who runs on Vote bank and educating him is a tough process so, create flashy schemes to lure them.
2. The people who mocked me came from good families.The school where I studied was one of the top schools in the city. It has produced bright professionals. But why did they lack empathy? Is it their fault or the fault of the education they received? Do we need to make our children a better humans first and then successful people?
3. I hid the fact. My thought process was its a big stigma, I might be framed as someone with lose morals. My self confidence hit the lowest abyss. As parents are we giving our daughters the confidence they need to have in us? We educate our children so that we have faith in them but do they have faith in us?
4. The bike boy: Well, he was someone who was a Juvenile technically and mentally. Compare him with the Stadium boy. He was more privileged, more educated, rightly educated than the Stadium Boy.This brought in a change in mentality.
I am not talking about what is to be done with the Juveniles who commit heinous crimes. My objective here is to raise some points that how these can be avoided because on the day of the incident
I thought If I had died will hanging the boy bring me back to life?
No. It will be justice delivered.
Will it stop all the crimes of the same fashion?
No, People will commit crimes.
Why?
Because CRIME HAS BECOME AN ATTITUDE.
So, how to uproot this permanently?
Evolve into a better informed and empathetic society.
How much time will it take?
Many years.
Which government will do that?
We will do that because Government is BY THE PEOPLE, OF THE PEOPLE, FOR THE PEOPLE
So, we are the only power who will stay forever the rest will come and go in five years.
It's our Country, Our People, Our Children.
Weather the victims and criminals both are our children. So, its our responsibility to correct them before their souls are lost. Weather a murderer or the victim both the souls are lost forever.
DISCLAIMER: ALL THE CHARACTERS IN THE STORY ARE JUVENILES AND ANY RESEMBLANCE TO ANY PERSON NEAR BY YOU IS TO BE ADDRESSED BY YOU AND ONLY YOU.
All of a sudden I hear a voice, "tssk tssk" I speed up frantically and in moments, a boy hardly of 16 or 17 comes in grabs my hand and says "Come with me."
"No!" I shout back and try to bite him. He slaps me but I somehow manage to free myself but he grabs me from the back
"Kick them hard on the balls."
I remembered what my father said to me but he is facing my back so, how can I. I struggle vehemently making sure I don't shout because I knew shouting may turn this into a group thing and a lone person is easier to fight than the group.
As I struggled my life flashed past me. "The Topper Me", "The House Vice Captain Me","The Good Daughter Me", "The Responsible Elder Sister Me.", "The Writer Me.", "The Ambitious Me.", "The Hopelessly Romantic Me." all flashed past me and I thought all will end. Was my life all these to come to an end like this? Am I nothing but a stranger's object of perverted lust? Will my first touch by the opposite sex be that of a horror?. Funnily I didn't know how intercourse is but I knew Rape was something which can even kill you.
As I was counting my breathes thinking it to be my last few I thought that let him turn me and then I will kick him but then he left me and I saw that the reason for his sudden kindness was a car that passed by, I ran hard and reached to a place where there were people and soon faced another eve teasing.
I confided in my best friend who was a girl as I could not disclose it to my parents as they had hands full with their own problem. What she did was amazing. She spread it across like a wild fire. i was taunted and teased in hushed voices just because I was a quiet child my emotions were not counted in.
It made me very angry.
A few days later while traveling by a Tempo (Ford Tempo in Public Transport Form) I was groped as usual by someone aged 20 to 22. I kept quiet and tried to angle myself to safety. All of a sudden a boy from the tution of my age riding a bike (in small towns legal age of driving a bike is not an issue) offered me a lift and i gladly took it. On sitting on his bike the first thought struck me was, "Oh My God! What have i done?" this boy had a crush on me and used to gaze me all day long in the classes. I became petrified remembering the incident a few days back. The way I was treated and the insults afterwards had shattered my confidence. it had robbed me of my childhood and adolescence. All the while he was talking sweet nothings and was having a time of his life (We didn't had social networking so, the adolescent love had its innocence) and i was having a harrowing time with in me that he would.....
But he didn't. He left me to my destination and the next time we talked properly was ten years after.
My anger subsided after this.
I noted a few things:
1. The person who assaulted me was from the unprivileged section of the society: He lacked education, had to see the harsher part of the life and was aggressive and brutal. He was so, used to be treated like an animal that he became an animal. If he is a criminal in the making whose fault is it? His or the society? The Government? who runs on Vote bank and educating him is a tough process so, create flashy schemes to lure them.
2. The people who mocked me came from good families.The school where I studied was one of the top schools in the city. It has produced bright professionals. But why did they lack empathy? Is it their fault or the fault of the education they received? Do we need to make our children a better humans first and then successful people?
3. I hid the fact. My thought process was its a big stigma, I might be framed as someone with lose morals. My self confidence hit the lowest abyss. As parents are we giving our daughters the confidence they need to have in us? We educate our children so that we have faith in them but do they have faith in us?
4. The bike boy: Well, he was someone who was a Juvenile technically and mentally. Compare him with the Stadium boy. He was more privileged, more educated, rightly educated than the Stadium Boy.This brought in a change in mentality.
I am not talking about what is to be done with the Juveniles who commit heinous crimes. My objective here is to raise some points that how these can be avoided because on the day of the incident
I thought If I had died will hanging the boy bring me back to life?
No. It will be justice delivered.
Will it stop all the crimes of the same fashion?
No, People will commit crimes.
Why?
Because CRIME HAS BECOME AN ATTITUDE.
So, how to uproot this permanently?
Evolve into a better informed and empathetic society.
How much time will it take?
Many years.
Which government will do that?
We will do that because Government is BY THE PEOPLE, OF THE PEOPLE, FOR THE PEOPLE
So, we are the only power who will stay forever the rest will come and go in five years.
It's our Country, Our People, Our Children.
Weather the victims and criminals both are our children. So, its our responsibility to correct them before their souls are lost. Weather a murderer or the victim both the souls are lost forever.
DISCLAIMER: ALL THE CHARACTERS IN THE STORY ARE JUVENILES AND ANY RESEMBLANCE TO ANY PERSON NEAR BY YOU IS TO BE ADDRESSED BY YOU AND ONLY YOU.
You nailed it Datta. "Weather the victims and criminals both are our children. So, its our responsibility to correct them before their souls are lost. Weather a murderer or the victim both the souls are lost forever." I've been writing on this theme for last few days. It seems that we are tuned on same frequency in this matter. Probably my article will be online tomorrow.
ReplyDeletethanks Ravish For Dropping in. I was going through a few post of yours and I found it Thought provoking and balanced. Respect for being so balanced in your approach. Yes seems like we are tuned on the same frequency. :)
DeleteI understand your point Datta, and I feel that capital punishment couldn't be the solution in every rape case. But when the violence is demonic ? then ? I don't think we'll be able to forgive the convicts and death penalty is the only option in those cases !
ReplyDeleteYes Mani, then maybe or a life long in jail. My focus is not preventive its corrective here. Once a criminal commits a heinous crime his or her soul is lost there is no redemption (I have discussed it in my previous blog post) but what happens before the crime when symptoms of this future hideousness peeks in? Why not control and correct it then. It will save at least two lives
DeleteNicely written..
ReplyDeleteFollowing your blog ..
Thanks Ananya :)
DeleteI get your POV. Nobody is born a pig but not sure where, when and how one transforms into behaving like one. I have a son, I know WE (my family) will do the due diligence raise him to respect this world to be a safe place for women. But I don't want to be a parent who cusses herself taking responsibility for his inappropriate actions.
ReplyDeleteThis world is made of both good and evil. As much as I would like to see this utopian world (even if it takes a gazillion years), my mind denys to believe it's an achievable reality.
Nonetheless very revolutionary approach though.
Thanks Vidhya for leaving your views. As parents our duty is to give proper guidance and try with our soul to educate the soul we bring in. Weather they follow or not is their jurisdiction.
DeleteInteresting.
ReplyDelete